You Said It Without Saying It

Is what you say actually as important as the way that you say it, as well as how you carry your body when you do? Studies show that the answer is usually no. Our body language is often far more important than what we actually say.

Experts estimate that up to 55% of all human communication is non-verbal, and further 38% is tone of voice! After all, as mammals we have a lot more in common with our primate cousins than we often realize, and like them, we tend to use gestures, posture, facial expressions (and yes, even grunts and huffs) to express exactly what we mean. That leaves only 7% of what is actually communicated directly linked to the specific words that we choose.

I am sure you can think of an example of this in your own life—someone saying “have a nice day” in a way that conveys that they are actually wishing you the very opposite. Or maybe you can recall a time that someone was clearly out of sorts with discomfort as they told you a blatant lie? Tone of voice, physical expression, and general demeanor—these can all speak volumes, even when their message is unintended by the individual. Most of us are rather good at determining what a communicator really means, their words aside.

The main types of body language & what they say about you

Whether you intend to communicate certain emotions or not, your posture, gestures, and overall body language can tell your audience exactly what you are thinking. Here are the most common examples of body language and what they convey.

• Crossed arms across the chest
If you have heard about one type of body language, it is likely this example. Crossing your arms across your chest indicates that you are being defensive, feeling threatened or are irritated at the other people in your vicinity.

• Nail biting
Have you ever found yourself nibbling at your nails when you are feeling nervous, insecure, and/or stressed out? The people around you will certainly notice that you are engaging in this nervous habit, and they will instantly perceive your emotional state.

• Resting your hand on your cheek
Gripping your chin, placing your fingers over your lips, or resting your hand on your cheek? You are likely lost in thought or deep in concentration about the situation in question.

• Tapping or drumming your fingers
Tapping or drumming your fingers on an available surface (or fidgeting in another similar way) clearly demonstrates that you are growing bored or impatient. Keep this habit in check if you don’t want to offend.

• Open palms (facing upward or outward)
When you present your open palms to another person you are demonstrating honesty, sincerity, and submission. You are quite literally showing the other party that you have nothing to hide. This gesture can be used to diffuse a tense situation in a nonverbal way.

• Nodding your head
Subtly nodding your head while another individual speaks clearly demonstrates that you are in agreement with the ideas being conveyed. A smile and a nodding head can really start to build excitement and develop your relationship.

• Picking lint, examining split ends or similar action  Picking lint or split ends shows the communicator that you think your micro tasks are more important than what they have to say. If you do not want to let your boredom show through, try to limit these kinds of actions.

• A lowered head Lowering your head (and therefore limiting eye contact) can indicate that you are hiding something. While this lowered head may actually be the result of shyness or humility, it can easily come across as shame or secrecy. Try to keep your head level and your gaze steady.

Improving your body language

You could be communicating all kinds of emotions, moods, and opinions to the people around you without even realizing it!  A quick perusal of the body language list demonstrates that subtle movements and nervous tics can be making you appear shifty, dishonest, and timid.
If you are about to meet with a client, begin salary negotiations, or even go on a first date, you will want to avoid ‘negative’ body language and work on bolstering the kinds of body language that convey strength, honesty and character.

DO – practice with a power pose. Harvard professor Amy Cuddy has shown that just two minutes of ‘power posing’—standing tall, holding your arms out or toward the sky (or even standing in a Superman stance with your hands on your hips) can really increase your self-confidence. This is a great pose to employ before you enter into a situation that might make you nervous.

DON’T – gesture above your shoulders. While ‘talking with your hands’ is a great way to emphasize your message and keep your meeting focused, gesturing too wildly will make you look unhinged.

DO – Smile! Grimacing, frowning, and glaring will all send a negative message, but you may not realize that these expressions will also send negative signals to your brain. Tasks will become even more difficult if you have a negative expression on your face, but there is a cure—smile! Forcing yourself to smile can actually help to improve your mood and help you to conquer even your most dreaded tasks with ease! Furthermore, you might need to ask a friend what you're ‘resting face’ resembles.

DON’T – Fidget. Just like an uncomfortable child, when an adult fidgets while listening, it very clearly sends a message to those around them that they are bored and unprofessional. In the event that you are a constant fidgeter, consider this your number one challenge—spend time practicing standing and sitting still.

Body language & sales – Closing the deal

What does the above information mean for individuals who rely on using their body language to close sales deals? For one, you need to always remember that even if you are not conscious of your body language, your clients certainly are. While your words may convey a spectacular proposal ideally suited to their event, if your body language is communicating worry, doubt, and anxiety you are likely going to kill your sale. Be mindful, radiate confidence, calm, and skill—and you’ll increase your sales and your bottom line. 

Please, Not Another Sales Meeting

Oh no—here comes the morning eye roll, the significant glance between co-workers, the hunched shoulders, the slow shuffle to the conference table. So much of what can go on at a sales meeting can instill a sense of dread or contempt—even before it has commenced! We know meetings are crucial to the overall health of a company. Why is there so much trepidation to attend them? More than likely it is because of situations like these:

The meetings are unorganized. With no agenda or structure established, it is hard for anyone to stay on point and remain focused.

Going off on tangents. This happens often. Someone journeys off on a tangent that is unrelated to the main topic of discussion and completely derails the meeting.

Rehashing of old items. When you spend too much time talking about the same things or recapping what everyone already knows and never getting to new information, it can make the meeting unproductive for everyone involved. People will check out mentally when there is no new information to absorb.

Sales are sales. Having department heads at a sales meeting is a waste of time. It is not a sales meeting then; it is now an all-team meeting. In this situation, the important topics such as strategies and education can often be brushed aside.

How can you avoid these occurrences and have a great weekly meeting? Here are some solutions to stay on track and make meetings productive, fun, and eagerly anticipated.

Planning your sales meeting

Keep in mind basics such as:

Start and end times. Your sales force is likely working on a tight schedule. They have calls to make, clients to see, and contracts to handle. Make sure the meeting has both a start and end time that works well in everyone’s schedule and that you stick to it as closely as possible.

Keep it timely. While you certainly do not need to have a three-hour sales meeting each week, it needs to be lengthy enough to be productive. An hour gives you time to cover all of the topics you need to get to, without belaboring. You do not want to spend time re-hashing everything that went on at this past weekend’s event; your operations meeting can take care of that. Instead make this hour about information, teaching, inspiration, and ways to achieve goals.

Choose the right day. Having your meeting on Monday morning is probably the worst time for you and your staff. Everyone likely needs Monday to catch up after the weekend and can’t devote time to a meeting right away. Friday can be just as bad as everyone is going to be swamped with weekend events. Choose a day mid-week at a time when your staff typically has a schedule lull. Once that day is chosen, stick with it so the team can plan their week around it.

Your sales meeting in four acts

You can break your meeting into four 15-minute blocks that will keep it moving and productive. Try a set up like this:

1. Tracking. Don’t start your sales meetings on a low note. Use the first 15 minutes as a way to praise everyone for the numbers they had during the past week. Congratulate individuals for hitting and exceeding particular sales goals. Make it a big deal because, well, it is a big deal! A round of applause from the group is a great motivation. You can even use this time to hand out gift cards as recognition for great work. For those that may have missed their goals, now is not the time for chastising or reprimand. They know they missed the mark already and with the right motivation will strive to do better.

2. Opportunities. There are always new sales opportunities, so devoting 15 minutes for everyone to share ideas and leads can be ideal. Have each person bring a potential sale they want to go after that week to the meeting. Maybe it is a gala they had bid on the previous year and did not get, but want to go after it again this year. Now is a good time to share that information and gain ideas from their peers.

3. Education. Your sales meeting can offer great teaching moments so don’t let them slip by. Take 15 minutes to go over different effective sales techniques, do some role playing so your sales force can envision how to work with different clients and situations, talk about how to build solid relationships and make proposals, or teach the best way to close a deal. This kind of information can be a big help to your team.

4. Big takeaway. Take the last 15 minutes to go around the table and have everyone comment on their favorite takeaway. The key to doing this is that each person must say something different and not repeat someone else’s answer. If they know this final segment is coming, it keeps your employees engaged throughout the meeting. It also helps them hear important points being reinforced by others.

Your role in all of this

Your role as the facilitator is crucial. Make sure the meeting starts and ends on time no matter what. If for some reason the meeting has to be cancelled because of an event, make sure you reschedule it for the same week. If you cannot be there, have another staff member facilitate. There also may be times when a particular topic needs to run longer for greater emphasis, so let the team know about it early on so they can adjust their schedules.

It is your job as the leader to make sure the sales meeting is a good one each week. You want your team to feel excited about going to the sales meeting each week and leave feeling inspired and ready to be productive. Don’t be afraid to assign homework for the next meeting so people can think about and be ready for the next time. Finally, once the meeting is over, arrange time to meet with each salesperson one-on-one for about 15 minutes each. This gives each person time with you to ask questions, get advice, talk about strategies for new business, tweak individual techniques, and go over their numbers.

Sales meeting do not have to be the groan-inducers or eye-rollers that everyone dreads going to. If you make the meetings purposeful, interesting, and inventive, everyone will be sure they can attend each week and the company will benefit overall.

MERYL'S BOOK JUST RELEASED  BOOKED IT!

What Your Clients Need to Know Before They Hire a Caterer

1. Fresh doesn’t always mean fresh

Couples today are food savvy. They dine out regularly at chic bistros and BYOBs rather than settling for the local chain restaurant. Fresh food, creative menus and plate presentation are important to them. And these high standards get even higher on their wedding day.

The thought that their wedding food might be frozen would send them running. Most caterers realize this, which is why few will admit to using frozen products. Instead when asked, they say their food is fresh and yes, at some point it was fresh. Right before it was frozen.

Is there anyway to tell if you’re getting a straight answer? One way is to consider the bottom line. Most caterers in an area use the same vendors and purveyors, so in general, the cost of purchasing the raw products is the same. Ask the caterers you are considering to bid on identical menus and give you the price of the menu alone (without rentals, linens etc.) If there is a big difference in cost for the same menu it should raise a flag.

How can caterer A charge $65.00 a person when caterer B charges $80.00? If nothing else has been factored in then it has to be in the food itself. Is caterer A buying cheaper cuts of meat, old produce or seafood that is a day away from being bait?

Scary, but possible. It’s much more likely that the $15.00 represents the difference between paying trained chefs to actually prepare your meal from scratch with fresh ingredients rather than having a body tearing open boxes. It may seem on the surface that you’re really getting a deal but in reality you are getting what you paid for – frozen food.

Your meal should be prepared from scratch by chefs, just for your event. Your hors d’oeuvre made by hand, not machine.

Source: Feastivities Events / Love Shack Photo

2. Served fresh means cooked on site, not cooked elsewhere and carried in hotboxes.

This is the difference between green beans that are bright green and snappy and green beans that are dull olive and mushy. Some caterers don’t have the trained kitchen personnel to actually cook the meal at the reception. Instead your food is thawed and cooked at the caterer’s kitchen early in the day, put into hot boxes and then brought to the reception.

The cooked food sits trapped in its own steam for hours before it’s ever served. We’ve all had food from a steam table. Once in a while you have to. But at your wedding? The fresh ingredients for your meal should be prepped at the caterer’s commissary. They should make the stock, clean the fresh vegetables, and trim the fresh seafood. They should do everything but cook it, because we know that the finest food goes from stove to plate not from hotbox to plate. If you want the food served fresh this is how it has to be done.

3. Service is a matter of math – the ratio of staff to guests is critical.

You’ve taken the time, allotted the budget and selected a wonderful menu so now you need to ask how many staff your caterer will provide to serve it. Nothing is more frustrating than having to hunt for hors d’oeuvre or wait in line for a drink.

Service can make or break your reception. Lack of adequate staff is very obvious to the guests and will undo all your careful planning. Be wary if a caterer plans to send 5 staff to attend to 200 guests! Call me crazy but I don’t want to have to look for waiters in order to eat. I want them to look for me. Which brings me to staff quality. It’s important that staff is well-trained. Ask the caterer about their training sessions and manuals. Your staff should be service oriented, pleasant and attentive because your guests should never feel as if their needs are an imposition.

4. Style is significant.

The visual impact of your menu really does have an impact on your guests and the success of the reception. But the best thing any caterer can bring to your table is the sheer enthusiasm and will to create a day for you unlike any other. With the right caterer your sense of style will show in your menu and its’ presentation, as well as in the surroundings and décor.

Source: Feastivities Events / Love Shack Photo

5. Menu design does not involve picking your food from columns.

Some couples come to a caterer with definite menu ideas but far more come wanting the planner to take the reins. And justifiably so. Your caterer’s event planners should be well versed in menu design but if you want to be more prepared for the menu meeting think about some of the following. What kind of crowd is it? Are they younger and more receptive to many cuisines? Is it more the parents set who prefer familiar but at the same time fine dining?

“Meat and potatoes” is used to describe guests who prefer plain. Keep in mind that the hors d’oeuvres also contribute to the scope of the menu so if your budget doesn’t allow for a raw bar it probably does allow for butlered shrimp during the cocktail hour. When you have finally chosen the menu have the executive chef review it. Often he or she will be able to make welcome suggestions – a seasonal vegetable, a more complementary sauce, a striking garnish.

Source: Feastivities Events

6. Customer service counts.

How long did you wait for your information after you made your initial phone call? Was it the information you asked for? Are your calls and emails answered in a timely manner? Do you feel important? In a time when you pump your own gas, find it for yourself in the store and wait in line or on hold daily, service seems a thing of the past. In terms of customer service the good old days really were better and it’s this old-fashioned customer service that you want from your caterer.

Planning a wedding is a big job and you should have your catering planner’s attention when you need it. In addition to your planner’s attention you should also have the attention of their whole office team so if your planner is out of the office another planner can field your questions.

And while you most likely will work closely with just one person, your planner should have a support system behind them. The unexpected can happen – a planner can leave, have an emergency etc. If this happens what happens to you and your wedding? If your caterer has a team approach the show will go on without a hitch.

7. Word of mouth is still the best advertising

What is your caterer’s reputation? Look at the list of caterers for the venues you are considering. If you see the same names at many up market locations chances are those caterers are doing something right. An exclusive facility has its own reputation to uphold so the caliber of the caterers on its’ list has to be high. Don’t hesitate to question the facility directors. They have a real sense of the caterers’ abilities so their input can be very valuable. They have seen it all – multiple times.  

With just a little guidance from you the director can often hone right in on the caterer’s that will make a fit with you. Between work, school and everything else on your plate who has the time or inclination to interview 8 caterers? It’s much better to eliminate the 5 or 6 that aren’t likely to be what you want, right from the start. Most places have short lists so the weeding out has already been done for you. But some facilities that have ties to local townships have to have an open door policy. Their directors are also required to “be fair.” With them you might have to probe a little longer. “Who do you use for your own events?” is a good question.

With access to so many caterers they themselves use is probably at the top of the list. Industry pros also have a good sense of who’s who and who’s doing what in the wedding world. Speak with the bands, florists and photographers you are considering. They are at events from start to finish. They see the service, eat the food, interact with the staff and won’t hesitate to share their thoughts.

Remember though, that perfection doesn’t exist in the real world. Servers do drop plates sometimes, musicians hit sour notes, photographers take blurry pictures, and limousines get flats.

Look for a caterer who gets high marks time after time, year after year. In the end this consistent commitment to quality will give you a great catering experience.

Change the Way you Approach Sales- the 12 Components of Sales Excellence

Those who enter the special events industry are a unique breed—they have a passion for celebrating the moments in their clients’ lives with flair and creativity, and they will stop at nothing to ensure that an event or a conference is executed without a hitch. Event pros are passionate and excited about what they do—and they do it well.                                                        
Most people involved in our industry entered into this field because of their passion for and skill set in events and culinary arts; but while these elements are vital, they are not the only factors necessary for success. In this industry you must be more than a brilliant caterer and a meticulous planner, you must also have panache for sales.

Sell, plan and execute – are you strong in all three?

In order to succeed and make your business everything you know it can be, you need to be a master at following skills:

Selling – You know that your vision and execution will blow your prospective clients away, but now you need to convince them to feel the same! They need to know why you are different and what it will mean to them.

Planning – Meticulous planning involves creativity, attention to detail, and the ability to think on your feet. Without confident and effective planning—even if your event is a hit—the stress you have caused your clients will lead to poor reviews and negative word of mouth.

Execution – This is the real test of your perseverance. Ensuring that your event is elegant, well received, and on trend is the third major responsibility of any successful event planner.

For most of us, planning and execution are our strongest suits, and sales can fall by the wayside.

Are your sales skills—or lack there of—hindering your business and preventing you from achieving the heights you could otherwise be reaching? You are not alone. Read ahead for vital sales tips that can help you change the way you operate your business.

Change the way you approach sales

Here are 12 components of sales excellence: do you have them all?                                                                  

Attitude – Great sales skills begin here. Even if you are feeling down, stressed, or irritated, you have to let this go and approach every sales meeting with vigor and energy. Let your prospective client know just how much their business means to you, and keep that smile on your face. If you enter the meeting feeling defeated, your clients will sense this, and their business will go to a competitor.                                                                                                                                               
Desire – You know you want this job, your staff members know you want this job, your spouse knows you want this job—now you must communicate this desire to your clients! When they see how excited you are to help them plan their event your excitement will be contagious.                     
Tenacity – To be truly tenacious, you need to use different information in order to make different decisions and find different ways to reach your goals. The key word is different! Stay on top of current publications, make new connections, and network constantly. These factors will help you stay sales savvy.

Money motivated – A great salesperson is motivated by their financial rewards at the end of the project. This is where add-ons, special request fulfillments, and accurate billing all come into play. Make sure that you are valuing your time correctly, too!

Eager to learn – When it comes to sales, as well as most aspects of your career, a hunger for new information and a commitment to lifelong learning will guarantee that you stay up-to-date with new skills and sales techniques that will strengthen your sales abilities.

Self-confident – A great salesperson simply must have confidence in their own abilities and the capacity of their company to fulfill their clients’ requests. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should your clients?

Appreciative of a challenge – If you approach a difficult sales situation or a prestige client with a defeated attitude, you will certainly limit your success and get passed over time and time again. Appreciate these challenges, roll up your sleeves, and tackle them with gusto. Your sales figures will reflect your courage!

Persistence – Once you have met with your prospective clients, you need follow up by the end of the day. Thank them for their time and remind them of the positive elements you will bring to their event, and then keep following up until you are informed of their decision.

Competitiveness – In the special events industry you might find yourself regularly bidding against your friends, and you must get ready to unleash your fiery competitive spirit! Keep an eye on your colleagues, and always stay one step ahead of the trends.

Able to cope with rejection – We have all been there: rejected. It feels terrible, but part of being a great salesperson is in knowing how to get up, dust yourself off, and keep your spirits high. After all, if you let this rejection affect your attitude you will lose more clients—and no one likes a vicious cycle like that!

Great listening skills – Have you ever spoken to someone who clearly is not a good listener, a person who keeps interrupting you and putting words in your mouth? It’s annoying and downright rude, and this person may have lost your business due to this behavior. Keep this in mind when you enter into a conversation with a prospective client. Take notes, make eye contact, and repeat their needs back to them to ensure you understand. Too often we are thinking of the next question without listening to their last answer.

Physically and mentally energetic – Finally, in order to be a great salesperson you must have energy! Racing from meeting to meeting takes physical stamina, and remembering the countless small details involved in planning is mentally tasking. Keep fit by exercising, meditating, and taking care of yourself, because without your health, your business is nothing!

MERYL'S BOOK JUST RELEASED  BOOKED IT!

GET YOUR COPY HERE